. . . . .I finally had to tell someone. It was Jim, one of my editors, a goodfriend, who I'd shared several global and barroom adventures with. I'dgiven him a sketchy outline of the Laotian story before I'd left. Now,over the phone, my female voice confirmed what I was trying to tellinghim, but it didn't convince him. I told Jim I was scared and felt veryfucked up. I told him there was proof and how he could see my privatev-blog. I gave him an email address to contact me.He'd written at 3 a.m.: "Fuck, Mike! It happened, didn't it?"I wasn't ready to meet him. I wasn't ready to see anyone. I stayed inmy apartment mostly, slipping out at nights for groceries and things inan overcoat. I continued my daily recordings and my editor friend Jim kept watching. He continued to email me. It was the night I drank the scotch that I just lost it. I was drunkand irrational and all my frustrations came out. I showed my breasts ina fit of broken acknowledgement. I ranted about how I. Then he whispers:Him: Tell me to fuck you baby.Me: Mmmmm…fuck me.Him: How do you want me to fuck you?Me: Fuck my ass real good.Him: Does my cock feel good in your ass?Me: Mmmm Yes…Him: Say “Fuck me please.”Me: Fuck me please.Him: Now say, “Fuck me nigger.”Me: Fuck me…Him: …nigger. Say it.Me: Fuck me…nigger.Him: Again…Me: Fuck me...nigger.Him: Again.Me: Fuck me niggerHim: Again!Me: Fuck me nigger!Him: AGAIN!Me: FUCK ME NIGGER! FUCK ME NIGGER! FUCK! ME! NIGGER!With every thrust came the words. At first I was a bit in shock at what he wanted me to say but the hell with it. He was really starting to fuck me and I didn’t care as long as he didn’t stop. He pounded my ass. The sounds of me screaming, “FUCK MY FUCKING ASS NIGGER!” and his body slapping against my ass filled the room. He then yelled, “You like my black cock in you! Take it white boy!” All I could do was scream yes in return. I felt like I was losing it. He was ramming his cock into me relentlessly with iron grips on my ass. I.
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