In an instant my life with him flashed through my skull – the early picnics, when they were still together. Wrestling in the grass. At a couple of his baseball games, and after, him leaning into me, me with my arm around his shoulders. Even during the divorce, when we would sit together in the back, him periodically grabbing my hand and me holding it, then putting it aside, anxious that some fucker from the church would see – would use my presence and proximity as a wedge to drive him from his father. And later, during his darkness – the way he avoided contact – avoided touch – aggressively shook my hand and let go too early, making a show of his male distance.I pulled back, looking at him. I saw him with new eyes. The side-table light was still on. We had been doing this in full view – not in darkness – and like the rest of the evening my instincts on this had been correct. I could see his face. It was open. I could see his desire. I could see his fear. It was pure, but. Rob licked his lips and said, “We just hired two new cooks. They’re going to be working nights until Jimmy is convinced that they can handle the job.”“Okay. So you want me to go back to being a busboy,” Dan said starting to remove his apron.Shaking his head, Rob said, “No. I want you to fill in as cook two nights a week.”“Okay. I don’t see a problem with that,” Dan said wondering why Rob was acting so strange. It seemed to him that all Rob had to do was tell him what job he wanted done and he’d go do it.“I want to cut your hours back to Friday and Sunday.”Dan frowned as he considered the loss in income that would represent. Wondering if he had done something to anger someone, he asked, “Why? Did I do something wrong?”“No. I talked to Mr. Foreman. He wants you to work some additional hours this summer. He told me about how you found some people cheating him. He wants you to go through all of his books, especially concerning his subcontractors, and find out if there are any others.
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