* Local Area Network in Australia - the LAN down under.* Every calendar’s days are numbered.* A lot of money is tainted - Taint yours and taint mine.* A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.* He had a photographic memory that was never developed.* A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.* Once you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall.* Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.* Santa’s helpers are subordinate clauses.* Acupuncture is a jab well done.Another candidate joke, from Reltney McfeeMy father, a concert to Catholicism, told me a story of another fellow, taking classes to convert. This fellow, I was told, told the priest “Father, I get ‘The Trinity’. What I do not understand, is the ‘Divine Revelation’ business.”The priest leaned back in his chair, regarded the prospective convert, and told him “My son, try an exercise. On Sunday, after mass, to out into the garden behind the church. Cast your gaze heavenward, spread. “You too, I’ll bet. But mostly with H. sapiens, it only goes one way. They can’t feel you, they can’t read you. A lot of the eKids in that situation stopped exercising that functionality when they didn’t receive any response from their parents. Of course, the majority of the first generation of eKids was girl twins. They were able to use telempathy with each other. God, wait till you meet my sisters! They carry telempathy to the nth degree!”Eamon had been nodding his head. He remembered thinking he could read his parents’ thoughts when he was very small. But the response he got from them was so negative that he stopped. “Well damn, Emmy! That’s a pretty big secret to be hiding! But I understand why you keep it quiet. People would go nuts if they thought you could read their minds.”“If H. sapiens find out about this, we could be in big trouble. The Religious Right hates us, E-man. Do you realize that we are a living refutation of creationism? We are evolution in.
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