.men."continued Amanda the whole time."Good sweetie. Now you can stop repeating for now. I want you to openyour eyes and watch the television for me." With that Dr. Morgan turnedon the tv set and thus began the semi-subliminal loop of pictures thatshe would have Amanda watch for the next two hours.It was a visual conditioning loop of pictures of handsome men....somefamous, like George Clooney and David Beckham.....others weremodels...some younger....some older.....there were many pictures of menwithout shirts with well-sculpted bodies...some very big....somethin......close-ups on handsome faces.....closeups on chests and abs andarms.....Hidden within the quick moving pictures were subliminal text messageslike "I want him to kiss me." or "I need a man to make me feel safe."Also, there were quick keywords like "strong", "handsome", "sexy". As it started, Dr. Morgan began to speak. "Look at the televisionAmanda. Look closely and do not look away. It is important that youdrink in. It’s of the utmost importance to me that I appear calm and composed with him- I suppose it’s my way of maintaining some feeling of control in a situation that has seemed from the outset to have been almost preordained. This isn’t serious, it isn’t emotional, but it’s sure as hell SOMETHING and whatever it is had me excited and skittish as I’ve ever been. When he unlocked the door the deadbolt shrieked and momentarily shattered all of that carefully-constructed composure, but I pulled it together and went inside. I laughed because it was dark- he’d warned me days before that things were a mess and I’d suggested that he simply keep the lights off and I’d never know- and then he flipped on the hallway lightswitch. We took a few steps into the room and I leaned up against the wall while we made idle conversation, hoping my legs wouldn’t give out and a little glad that I could so easily continue with the facade of nonchalance. ‘So how do we do this?’ ‘I don’t know. Turn out the light.’.
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