It used to be embarrassing,The way it would behave.For every single morning,It would stand and watch me shave.Now as old age approaches,It sure gives me the blues.To see it hang its little head,And watch me tie my shoes!!Here is an actual sign posted at a golf club in Scotland, UK :1. BACK STRAIGHT, KNEES BENT2. FEET SHOULDER WIDTH APART.3. FORM A LOOSE GRIP4. KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN!5. STAY OUT OF THE WATER.6. TRY NOT TO HIT ANYONE.7. IF YOU ARE TAKING TOO LONG, LET OTHERS GO AHEAD OF YOU8. DON'T STAND DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF OTHERS.9. QUIET PLEASE ... WHILE OTHERS ARE PREPARING.10.DON'T TAKE EXTRA STROKES.WELL DONE ... NOW, FLUSH THE URINAL, GO OUTSIDE, AND TEE OFFDid I read that sign right?In an office:TOILET OUT OF ORDER ... PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOWIn a Laundromat:AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUTIn a London department store:BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRSIn an office:WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR. She said that she was fine but started to cry more. I asked her if she wanted someone to walk or drive her home. She said that her boyfriend left with some other bimbo. I reached out and took her hand and said lets walk and you can tell me all about it. She hesitated briefly but then followed me out onto the sidewalk."My name is Rob what's yours?" I said."I'm Lindsey" Nice to meet you, do you live near by?"Lindsey replied "No I live in Eagan, but we came into Minneapolis for a friends birthday." Do you mind me asking how old you are?" I'm 22 how about you?"I told her that I am 38. Then she asked me where I was from."I'm from Iowa; I am just up here for a few days to get away from work" I replied, " I am staying at the Marriott." I heard that was a nice hotel" It is. I am on the 31st floor so I have a pretty good view of the city."Lindsey said "I would love to see the view from up there." Well, we can go check it out if you want to."She replied "I would, besides it would be nice to.
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