‘Why am I damned?’ he began. ‘Why am I filled with such falsehoods? I’m placed on this earth for no reason at all. I have no money. I don’t have an education. The only stuff I see is the stuff in my mind. The floating image of this slinky gyration, sometimes in motion, and for some reason all that I perceive must be false. I hardly know how to read, and writing this becomes difficult, because I lack the brain power to do anything for the common good, and here I sit at this cramped table, my mother most likely sleeping, and the morning light blares through my window like some forgotten tune. Why, dear Allah, must the light always be followed by darkness, and then light again? Why must I love so completely every single man and woman, and then suddenly I am forced into darkness, the darkness of petty hatreds and intolerance? The hatred within my soul hates completely, and yet I love completely, as though half of me loves, and the other half hates. Why am I confronted with such terrible. I love Emily too and she needs a man like you,I love having sex with you too but not as often. I am old and I have been with a lot of men in my life,it has been a fun journey but there will be an end . My journey will end long before yours so you will have Emily and hopefully several children before yours ends”. What Lee was saying did make sense and she has always been truthful to me “you are right”I said and gave her a kiss.She kissed me back “honey it isn’t just the sex that has made me love you , it is the kind of man that you are. Heck we didn’t have sex for almost two years after I fell in love with you. Emily doesn’t have two years to wait to start a family,trust me.The most precious thing in life is having children, don't lose the chance to have some ``.She then stood up “let’s get dressed and go for a ride” she said putting her coat on. Lee began telling me about how she became friends with the couple that owned the camp that she now owns.She said that Bud and Sandy Barre.
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