Without Vanessa it would have been an awkward gathering.Fortunately it never seemed awkward, and the food was all delicious. So I expected everyone had a good time. Everyone with the exception of me that is. For one thing I had to avoid the turkey. For another I avoided being alone with Vanessa. She had managed to insert herself into my life without any encouragement from me. That worried me. When people didn’t act logically it bothered me, a lot.I felt a little uneasy when the dinner ended. I drove back to the Gatehouse to settle in. My plan was to skip that evening’s hook baiting and go right to the TV/computer evening. Vanessa showed up at the door several minutes after I got home. Since she left mom’s house when I did, she had to have gone somewhere during that time.She had a plastic grocery bag when she entered the Gatehouse. Inside the bag was a two liter bottle of coke and an unmarked brown bag containing a fifth of Canadian Club. She didn’t feel hungry at lunch. The rest of the day was a blur. The wind and snow pushed against her back ushering her to the subway but it still felt like it was miles away. She crammed her way inside the crowded car until she was leaning against the opposite doors. Later Neesha would wonder why she looked up at that exact moment but as she did, she saw Mathew running to her train and get half of his body caught inside the closing door. She began to laugh in spite of herself and how uncomfortable Mathew looked. Her eyes felt like tearing up again. Finally the doors opened and he squeezed through. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to laugh at you,’ Neesha said still laughing. He was smiling and chuckling too. ‘It’s okay. I’m a sucker for punishment,’ he laughed but then his face went white as he saw Neesha’s eyes well up with tears. ‘Neesha, is there something wrong?’ He asked with pain in his voice. ‘Oh, it’s nothing,’ she sniffed, ‘it’s just that you’re standing on my foot.’ Sure enough,.
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