Was I just thinking too much?I needed to get a little perspective here. Despite all the supposedly fabulous men I had dated, I had never really had a boyfriend.Shocking, isn't it?What was the value in having a boyfriend? I could get a quality date whenever I wanted, to do whatever I wanted, wherever I wanted. I could have as little or as much sex as I wanted, and whatever kind I wanted. I could have complete control over any situation.A boyfriend would feel entitled to make demands on my time, on my attention, to have some say in the relationship. What did I need that for when I could get everything I wanted at no cost?Maybe this wasn't love and forever after; maybe it was just infatuation. Perhaps I had just been caught up in the moment. It was a most excellent moment to be sure, but a moment nonetheless.I loved being with Jeff, but I could do that whenever I wanted without having to make any kind of commitment.Well, maybe I couldn't. I would ask him for a specific time and he. But it gave me an excuse to tell them that I had made promises to several other people. However I would take their names and phone numbers and get back to them if the other people didn’t show up.Now if mommy was pretty I was all smiles. I would bring them in and show them the kittens. When the little girl or boy picked out their kitten I would give them a litter pan full of goodies to get them started.They almost always asked me if I wanted anything in return for payment. I would just tell them that I didn’t need any money but that sex or a date would be great. Then I would laugh it off and carry the litter pan to their car while the kid tried to strangle their new kitten.Occasionally the woman would get pissed off at me but she would take the kitten and stuff anyway. Sometimes they would tell me that they were happily married. And sometimes they would just smile and give me their phone numbers. With a batch of six kittens I was almost always guaranteed two dates. If they didn’t pan.
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