Steve leaned forward and put both hands on Doris's knees. She tried to cross her legs but Steve stopped her. "You got lovely legs, Doris," he croaked. "Why don't you... show us a bit more of them."Doris wriggled but her arms were held tight and Steve was gripping her knees. He slid one hand slowly along her thigh, pushing her dress higher. Suddenly he used both hands to shove the dress up to the top of her thighs. "Fuck!" he exclaimed. "Look at that! The bitch is wearing stockings!" Doris's struggles increased and she cried out "Leave me alone!" By way of an answer, Bob and Jack twisted her arms behind her back and she was bent forward, hardly able to move. The sight of her slender legs in nylons with suspender straps visible was too much for Steve. One by one he began to undo the buttons down the front of her dress. Doris was helpless. Her distraught face didn't stop Steve. Grunting heavily, he reached the last button. Bob put his arm across Doris's throat and pulled her upright on. He was starting to blister and in pain by the time the doctor arrived. To help, the doctor prescribed an IV with saline and electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours.The attending nurse was rather surprised by the prescription and asked, “What good will Viagra do him?”The doctor replied, “It will keep the sheets off his legs.”A recruit who wasn’t really m A recruit who wasn’t really meant to be a soldier went out to the rifle range for the first time. He missed every target and most of the hills behind them.Despondent, he said to the sergeant, “I think I’ll just go and shoot myself.”The sergeant said, “Better take a couple of extra bullets!”Little Johnny’s Confession The children were all lined up for their first confession when Little Johnny’s turn came. The priest asked him to confess his sins, and the boy promptly replied, “Father, I threw a stone at Jimmy.” “That was a very misguided thing to do, my son,” said the priest patiently. “It wasn’t misguided at all,”.
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