Instead I hadmemories of conversations after the fact; snippets of tales of the goodtimes and bad times of "my sister." Those memories tied me into the roleof passive observer but seeing Billy again had still brought back thepain and yearning of my real subsumed emotions. It was contradictory anddifficult to reconcile, but I found myself talking nonetheless."They were really in love. But like comets, you know? It was all fireand passion and spontaneity; sudden trips to Paris or Egypt; champagnecocktails on the beach in Thailand. But..." But?"I shrugged. "Alison loved him like he was... a drug she was hooked on.With this... desperation. Like she couldn't breathe without him there.It was... It was sort of inspiring, but it was also..." Creepy?" No. Not creepy. It was just so intense. And we all... everybody thoughtit would burn out in a couple of months. But they got married.Spontaneously of course. In Edinburgh. Nobody else there; just the twoof them." It's romantic." Yeah. It was." I. Bi?nx?ng r?n. Kathoey. Hangetsu. Shemale. Futanari. Bogjangdochag ja.I heard them all from my parents. To someone who cared, the labels wouldhurt. But to me? Four years of unstoppable life as a young, teenage girl!Feminine is me! Four years of milk thistle, flax seeds, soybeans, edamame,and other naturally occurring estrogenics had softened my skin, rounded myfigure, and made me a most attractive date for the prom. I knew my body --- and the boys in my class knew it too... S. S. S. My body.My parents, I think, no, I was certain, despised it.Just before leaving them for good, just before leaving them to pursue mydreams of fashion design at the Academy, to venture into the world as abrave trans leading sartorial trends, to live my life on the terms andconditions I chose, not those of my parents' choice, yes, just before thatmoment, that liberating moment, my parents offered me some tea afterdinner and I soon after passed out.I regained consciousness but could not see where I was. I was.
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