" "Let's see," May said, raising her big brown eyes to think, "Hair chemicals, face chemicals, hand chemicals, foot chemicals, arm-" "May! I know the list! I'm a girl, remember?!" "Oh, yeah. I, like, forget sometimes you're a girl." "I wish I could forget." Dobie added. "I'm being insulted from both sides. "May, there are girl things you didn't mention that-" "You, like, mean hair hardware, face hard-" "May!! You're not making this any easier! It's you that are supposed to hate having this talk." "Oh, that," May said, her tone and face falling. "I was right. I don't have to go to the drugstore." "Good-bye, Dobie!" "Zelda?!" Dobie blinked as the girl who swore he would be a virgin on their wedding day headed for the door. "Still-Possible-Future-Father-in-law Gillis, shock therapy." "Right you are, little girl." And he continued to watch his stupid son while the painfully pain genius girl left his store. "What did she mean by that, Dad?!" Dobie asked, going over to the counter. "It. You both must be really itching to get started. But first, I'd like you tell the audience a bit about yourselves, so let's begin with your, Mr. Gumby. We usually call our contestants by their first names, so what does the 'D.P.' stand for ?" " I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that, Mr. Gumby" " That's ok, Mr. Gumby. I understand that you must be pretty nervous, being on national TV and we're the hottest quiz show on the telly at the moment, so we'll just call you 'D.P.' then...is that OK ?" " And over to you, Miss Ratcatcher-Bucket...welcome to the show, Ophelia. My oh my, young lady that's quits a set of bazookas you're sporting there and might I add that you're looking particularly repulsive this evening. The warts are a nice touch, did you do them yourself or do they run in the family ? Tell the audience a bit about yourself" I'm a welder and I collect stamps and car registration numbers in my spare time, Kat. The warts were in the box I grew up in. Dad must have left them in.
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