A day out for the whole family at a local theme park. The little guy just couldn’t believe his luck and shouted out to his mom and dad in the audience about his sudden rise to fame and the good fortune that had come with it.The second spot prize was for the most creative outfit worn by one of these under thirteen year old performers. That prize was easily won by a young nine year old girl dressed up in a costume made entirely of fresh fruit and vegetables sown into the fabric of a skin coloured leotard. The costume did appear to be quite heavy but the young girl somehow managed to prance around with the others but with little bananas, and bunches of grapes, and long skinny cucumbers, and other produce bouncing around against her body. When she won her prize she became just as ecstatic as the first winner and started shouting out to her dad... “I won, I won, I won, I won.” But her faced dropped suddenly when she saw the prize certificate stating she had won $700 worth of home. . um ... other means of fulfilling that particular desire," I said carefully."Did it have a vibrator built in?" asked my mom, straight faced."No," I said in a very small voice as I blushed bright red."Get one that vibrates," she said sagely. "The rabbit is the best design I've ever found, and they're not so expensive any more." What does this have to do with anything?" I asked weakly."As I said, the women in our family are sluts. We can't keep our legs closed. You've resisted, and that's good. The tradition might actually work in your case. The whole point of it was to have one last fling before giving all that up for your new husband. It was supposed to sort of get it out of your system, I guess, and with men you could trust." But it didn't work that way for you?" Not hardly," she sighed. "Though it came in awfully handy when I got divorced."I blanched. "Surely you don't mean..."My own mother looked me dead in the eye. "It beats going to singles bars. Trust me on that."I know it.
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