”“Hah! You’re definitely my cousin. All right, animal style here we come.”We pulled into his driveway and I sat there for a moment enjoying the view before unbuckling. I loved his place. There was a feeling of comfort there. It was a nice home on a large plot of land. They never had kids, so they didn’t need much space in the house. Everything was in pastel colors that suited the stucco.They had two avocado trees, one in the front and one in the back. For the first few years of visiting them, I almost lept out of my skin when an avocado would fall and land on the metal roof over their enclosed porch. It was almost too perfect to be able to walk into your backyard and pick a lemon from one tree and avocados from another. Twenty minutes later, you were sitting poolside with the world’s freshest guacamole.Barbara met us at the door. A tall, willowy woman, she made their house a home. She was born and raised in California, but she reminded me of the stereotypical southern belle. Barb was. I went downstairs and watched some television until lunch, Phew, I thought, so far so good.About 12.45 I heard the door lock and keys rattling, and Mother came in, calling “Brian, are you home? “Yes Mother”, in here.She entered the living room and offered me a parcel, here you are dear I’ve treated you, after Auntie Sheila told me about yesterday and your sleepover.I was curious as to what she had said, but took the parcel and unwrapped it to reveal 2 pairs of boxer shorts with football emblems on, very nice I thought, “thank you mother”.“If they don’t fit let me know and I can change them at the next market day”.I started to feel flushed, as I thought, if I try them now she may see my shaved legs, and worse still my tuft.“Are you alright Brian you look a bit red, you’re not coming down with something”, as she felt my forehead, “mmm you are quite hot to the touch, maybe you should take a powder”, I’m fine mother don’t fuss, I will try these on later to see if they fit.I tried not to.
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