I glanced down, noting how close his thumb was to the hem of my skirt. Idly, I wondered if he had meant to touch my leg so close to my skirt, or if it was purely coincidence. After a few moments, however, he seemed to realize just where he had (inadvertently?) placed his hand, and moved it to my knee. ‘It’s okay,’ I assured him. ‘I honestly don’t mind. In fact, I find it… flattering.’ Our eyes met, and I smiled warmly at my big brother. The eyes – almost identical to mine – pierced me deeply, and suddenly I found that I was breathless, like prey trapped in a corner, shrinking back in fear, heart pounding violently and the lungs completely unable to function. Yet I was not afraid at all, so even though my heart was pounding vehemently and sounding loudly in my ears, the fact that I was breathless from just a single look, especially a single look from him, from my big brother, shocked me in a pleasant way, giving me that warmth deep in my belly… Eric retracted his hand. ‘Let’s head. Then say, ‘You realize this is my parents’ house and I have to consider them and consider our son before I can answer your question?’ ‘I understand, please call me as soon as you can.’ She responds with deep sadness in her voice. I then respond saying, ‘I promise I will get back to you as soon as possible.’ Hanging up the phone I think to myself, ‘Damn she has some fucking guts to ask me that question at 3:00 a.m. in the fucking morning!’ Since I know, my parents are already up as a result of my mother doing a paper route. I go in their room. I find my mother already left but, my father is sitting in his chair and is awake. I tell my father what happened. My father responds saying, ‘I won’t give you any advice on this because I have a lot going on and worried enough about my surgery next week’ Then he responds, ‘Besides I have no place to talk, I have made my share of mistakes in my life.’ ‘I understand.’ I respond to my father walking back to my bedroom. I chose to go back to sleep.
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