From that day for one week, all I could think, see or imagine was mom’s boobs.To divert my attention, I started watching porn. But after watching the Japanese video today, I couldn’t help but imagine myself and mom in that position. I know this is wrong, brother. I am very sorry, but I couldn’t help it.With this, he lowered his head and couldn’t look me in the eye. When he was explaining what happened, I got erect when he was describing mom’s tits. I burst into small laughter and told him it’s okay. I asked him if he wanted to know how I got into incest.This got him curious, and he asked me how. I said, “Just the same way as you, but it was much better.” He was shocked and asked me to explain.I said, “Okay, listen. Remember last year, once mom and dad had asked us to spend a day at grandma’s place? But I ended up dropping you at grandma’s place and went to my friend’s place for a stayover?”He said yes, vaguely. Then I continued, “After dropping you, I came home to pick up some porn. Ifelt that this was a sick joke played on me by a higher power. I hadspent my whole adult life denying this side of me so I wouldn't have todeal with it, and then my son goes and brings back the memories and themeaning of my urges.I wondered what I could say to him. I had spent most of my life livingwith my own self-loathing because of what I desired. I didn't want himto go through that, but I knew that my wife would be terribly upset ifshe knew of his dressing or my urges. My daughter would probably killhim for going through her stuff, and there was no telling how she wouldretaliate against him for putting on her uniform.I didn't know what to do. I couldn't look to my parents for an examplebecause I felt it was too cruel. I understood what he did too much to dosomething that traumatizing to him. I knew I couldn't humiliate the urgeout of him. I could only suppress it, and I always figured that was goodenough. I guess it was good enough for my parents.I did not want to be like them.
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