He was meaner than a junkyard dog and so tight-fisted he squeezed every penny 'til Abe screamed for mercy. Old clichés, I know but so apt.And you know what? I doubt there was a single member of the extended family who had any love for the old skinflint anyway. Through some perverse, twisted logic, I suppose some of them attended the rites hoping to be favorably mentioned in his will that was scheduled to be read immediately following the funeral; like he was going to make his final decisions about the disposition of his wealth from the great beyond and after he saw who did and did not showed up. I was totally confident that, my own attendance notwithstanding, I would not be a legatee because he knew very well that I thought his most endearing quality was that he was an accomplished asshole. What's more, I told him as much on more than one occasion. I'm not anywhere close to wealthy but I certainly didn't have any designs on his personal holdings. I'd never be able to not think of all. Take them away,” I added that last bit, mostly as a reminder to God that I figured out why he sent me there.“I know why you did that. You want to make sure that the residents here get our hands dirty here, in case we have regrets later. Don’t worry, I understand. I doubt that any of us will have any second thoughts, even I. It was necessary. The men here had to die. They were criminals, bandits, common brigands posing as militia. Outlaws, nothing else. You’re trying to help set this town back on its feet, with some semblance of law and order. Fair enough. I appreciate that. I’ll need to handpick a sheriff or marshal or constable or something to help enforce what laws we have. Thank you again for that.“Tell me, those ladies with you ... are they your wives or someone else’s? I’m just not sure about the family dynamics of your caravan or clan or tribe or whatever. Would you care to elaborate, because more than a few ladies and gents here are curious about some members as to, well,.
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