I'd driven past the place many times, and I'd always been intrigued by it, and I wanted to go inside and see for myself what it was like; but I'd always driven on past each time I'd initially thought I'd go in---except finally, on a very hot and humid summer day in 1981, I pulled into the dusty gravel parking lot and, with my heart pounding in my chest and neck, I walked in through the front door!The first thing that I noticed about the place was the heavy aroma of cigarette smoke. The place seemed totally saturated in it. There were three of four other men there, all browsing around the shelves of VHS tapes and magazines. No one made eye contact with anyone else. They seemed nervous. I felt nervous as well! I'd never been to an adult bookstore, and I found the whole thing a little bit daunting! The ambience of pure, unadulterated sexual lust was palpable! It was almost overwhelming in it's unvarnished intensity; and yet, I found it strangely appealing!I browsed around for five or. She said she found it extremely erotic and came like never before. She said she never thought surviving could be so much fun.I thought about it for a minute and told her that I really had no objections anymore. At first, the thought of it was repulsive, but now that we did it for survival and found it somewhat enjoyable, I thought there was nothing really wrong with what we were doing. But, I told her, we couldn't share what we were doing with anyone else because they would probably lock us up or disown us. She agreed.We spent the next few days doing the same while walking towards home. We were making progress healing and getting closer to home. Each day the walking was easier and we both felt stronger than ever. We even went back to fucking ourselves to sleep each night. I still collected edible plants when I saw them but a few times a day we would get our main nutrition from Lightning. A couple of times I even drank from the spigot. He almost choked me with his cock so I had to be.
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