She'd played flute; I played tuba. By the time we had exhausted most of our stories about band life, Lou had finished the fruit."You know what I would really like?" she asked. "Some chocolate-covered strawberries like they had last night. Those were really good. I wonder if there's any left?" Well, only one way to find out," I said. I picked up the phone on the table next to me and dialed room service. Yes, they had chocolate-covered strawberries, so I order a plateful and some champagne to go with them. They soon came, along with a pair of champagne flutes. I signed the chit, tipped the bell hop and returned with my goodies to the settee. I set the plate on the coffee table and proceeded to pop the cork. The champagne and the strawberries really did go well together, the tartness of the strawberries balanced with the sweet of the chocolate was offset by the dryness of the wine.We nibbled and drank our way through the treats, Lou sometimes feeding me. It was fairly romantic. We did. I plunge deeper into miasmic abyss. V. Like Plato’s hellish cave, fragments of dim light warp twisted shapes off the slippery black surface of the chrysalis. At least, I think it’s a chrysalis. I can’t be sure. I can’t be sure of anything anymore. I can’t move. I can’t feel. And I can barely see. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Five thousand, three hundred and forty-nine beats. When you realize you can’t hear your heart anymore, can’t feel it hammering against your ribs, sanity starts to slip. “Slip, slip, slip,” tiny voices tease, “just like the rest of us.” Five thousand, three hundred and forty-nine lies. “Do you see now? Do you, do you, do you?” Yes. I can. I’m sorry. I try to mean it. I really do. But this nightmare is pulling me apart. “No. No you aren’t, you trashy harpy!” they singsong. As if any of you would be sorry. Silence. Are there winners and losers when all you’re doing is fighting a thousand twisted versions yourself? The only thing I’m sorry.
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