There’s no way I can have it done. The cost from the hospital today, …’ Interrupting, ‘It’s paid for. The hospital covered it. You owe nothing.’ The range of emotions to cross her face was priceless. ‘I don’t owe anything?’ ‘Nothing. I discussed it with their financial aid people and your account will be fully covered.’ ‘How can I thank you?’ ‘Don’t thank me, you’re not out of the woods yet. Where will you travel from here?’ This was a leading question. ‘I don’t know.’ ‘Do you have any friends?’ ‘No.’ ‘You don’t know of anyone in California?’ Again she shakes her head. ‘Then you can’t stay there. You’ll have to return.’ She nodded knowingly, and then added, ‘But I don’t know anyone in KC either.’ ‘What about Denver?’ ‘I don’t know any one from Denver?’ she says with a scowl on her face. ‘I’ve never been there.’ I let her think. For a full minute she looks at the wall, reasoning, then…’ ‘Oh.’ And she looks right at me. ‘But you’ve done so much already.’ ‘Do you want my help? If. A few minutes passed and she lifted her head and looked at me. ‘I had nightmares,’ she said. ‘Every night they got worse. I couldn’t tell anyone. I was so scared. Then one night, I took a kitchen knife… it was my plan to kill myself, but instead ended up with just a small cut. I wasn’t strong enough to do it.’ ‘Thank God for that,’ I said. She just smiled. ‘Yeah. But doing that, it was the only way to make myself feel human again. It went on for months.’ ‘What happened?’ ‘Raven busted me,’ she confessed. ‘I told her everything. She was like my buddy in AA or something. Whenever I felt the need I would go to her.’ I just looked at her. I didn’t know what to say. ‘So,’ she said. ‘When you feel the need, call me.’ ‘Maranda…’ ‘Shh,’ she said, placing her finger on my lips. She looked into my eyes, smiled. ‘I love you, Lance,’ she confessed. I’m sure I gasped. ‘What?’ Holding her smile, she nodded. ‘I love you,’ she repeated. ‘I believe I always have. It’s okay if you don’t love me back..
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