Most Saturday afternoons I would venture to my nearest town, Glasgow, to buy my ladies tights for my weekend pleasure. By the early 1970’s I had a girlfriend who wore tights and on my request stockings and a Suspender belt. She worked till about 4pm most Saturdays and I used to travel in to meet her. This particular Saturday I went into town early to buy some Color Climax porno Mags from “Campbell’s Health shop” on Stockwell Street. This was before sex shops and you were met by a couple of old guys in white coats. The shop was stocked with porno mags, most with black stars covering the naughty bits...but they also sold the Swedish Color Climax Mags though these cost about £3 each. I had bought a couple along with a basic vibrator and the guy asked what I was up to now.....I said I had a couple of hours to pass till I met my girlfriend, he suggested I should go to the soft porno cinema The Classic Grand on Jamaica Street. So off I went..no queues, thankfully, straight in, paid my £2. It is still as vivid in my memory as the day it happened. And I hate it! I pray that I can forget it, but so far my prayers haven't been answered.Enough! It was done and it was over. Stop wishing and saying sorry over and over. It doesn't help anything! And stop waiting for fate to come along and punish you so it can then forgive you! God doesn't punish the guilty and reward the innocent! That was for stories and books. In the real world, innocents like Carmine pay the price for the guilty like me. I stayed home, free to come and go as I pleased. Carmine was locked up for trying to protect what was his. Hugo got off scott free taking something that didn't belong to him and paying no price. Sure he got beat up, but a beating wasn't much to sacrifice for taking what wasn't his to take. And I paid no price at all, unless it was the price of losing the man I loved, but when I think of it that way, the price I paid was actually pretty stiff. Maybe there was something to that. Maybe God.
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