AWhen “dub-yah” was president, one day he received a security briefing from defence secretary, Donald Rumsfeld, who had some sad news.“Mister President, three Brazilian soldiers were killed yesterday while supporting U.S. troops.”“Oh, my God,” cried President Bush, who then buried his head in his hands. He remained stunned and silent for full minute. Eventually, he looked up, took a deep breath, and asked Rumsfeld:“How many is a brazillon?”One day, Jesus said to his disciples: “The Kingdom of Heaven is like two x squared, plus five x, minus six.”Thomas was confused and asked Peter, “What does the teacher mean?”Peter replied, “Don’t worry - it’s just another one of his parabolas.”(This one’s a little more high-brow, and requires some basic knowledge of integral calculus)Isaac Newton and Gottfried Leibniz are in a pub.Isaac bemoans the lack of mathematical knowledge among the general public, but Gottfried is more optimistic.To prove his point, Gottfried waits until Isaac has to go to. ..Flashback – Colonel MaggieI couldn't fucking wait to get to Russia and give fucking Major M a bunch of shit! Why was I angry with him? I'll tell you! He thought he could use me to screw his way to becoming a General and that was a major mistake. The worst part was, he wasn't even that good. No problem, I bided my time and now his ass was mine...Flashback – GlenI felt damn good about the way I 'fixed' things! Yeah, sending Colonel Maggie to take care of the Major was a stroke of genius since those two got along like oil and water. Rumor had it he screwed her literally and physically and then dumped her ass. And we all know hell hath no fury like that of a woman scorned.I logged onto the computer, looked at Jennifer's credit card account and what the fuck was this charge!!!Flashback – JensDarn it all! I forgot to change the transaction on my charge card from the flowers for my Ben to a Russian language course and I just received a message from the credit card company that Daddy logged.
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