We both neededlast night. I needed to understand that I was capable of being with awoman. Your body is perfect. It held me and I enjoyed our sex. Youneeded to be with a man, be penetrated, prove to yourself that youcould attract a guy and love a guy. Now I sense that we both need somespace."He understood. I wasn't in love but I needed to find out whether I waswhole or just partially a woman. I learned for certain that I wouldnever have reassignment surgery. A man had completely enjoyed sex withmy body. I could see myself with my modest penis as female withoutbeing told. He said the most wonderful things that Saturday. I was gladI'd given myself to George.Saturday evening I stayed in and relaxed with the light low and thesoft music on my iPod filling the rooms. By Sunday morning I knew I hadto call Cynthia but I waited until after my walk to make the call."Yes its me. No I'm fine. Yes I did. No he was great. Details? No waygirl! Come pick me up. I'm walking back from the Park. She begins the final chant.Her friend Holly bursts into the basement. She pauses startled by the intrusion. She fumbles for the words to finish the spell, but she manages to articulate them.Nothing happens. She wonders if she missed or garbled a word in the final chant. She looks up at Holly.“What’s up, Holly?”“What the fuck do you mean, what’s up? You were supposed to meet me an hour ago for a little stress relief.”“I’m not sure I need it. I’m going to nail this interview.”“Well then, how about a celebratory drink?”Theresa laughs. Her tongue feels dry from all the chanting. “That sounds great. Can you give me a couple minutes to change?”“Of course, do think I want be seen with a flannel clad yoga dropout?”Theresa laughs, as they head up the stairs to her room. The sun in her bedroom is brighter than she can ever remember. She scampers to the window to shut the curtains. As she draws them closed she admires her fingernails. The are sharp, and a lovely shiny black.She smiles imagining.
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