I couldn't reconcile why I was not more fucked up by the fact that I was, to all intents and purposes, Julia. Why was it not phasing me as much as I thought it should, and why have the changes not seemed to affect my behaviour as much as they had the real Julia who was had turned, in the space of a few hours, from a confused crying woman to a dick wielding maniac.I had no answer. She seemed to have physically changed little and yet I, who was a shadow of my former self seemed, to be handling it so much better.I woke to find Julia lying next to me just staring at me as a lay face down on the mattress. The bed sheets had fallen to the floor, and she was sat upright just looking at me as I slept."Morning gorgeous" were her first wordsI just lay there wondering how to respond. Was that a joke? Was she trying to get a reaction? Or was she just trying to annoy me?I rolled onto my side and faced her. As I did so I felt my breasts shift, and I looked down to see them happily supporting. Some have good breasts, some have good behinds. The race is long, and, in the end, it's only with yourself (and/or your Dominatrix).Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell the butch dyke next to you how.Keep your psych's referral letters. Throw away your endocrinologist's bills.Do yoga.Don't feel guilty if you don't know what to do with your life. The most interesting people I know learned what to do with their life at 22 from a good dominatrix. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know are good dominatrixes.Get plenty of estrogen. Be kind to your boobs. You'll miss them when they're not as perky.Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll wear a frilly maid's uniform, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll get SRS at 40, maybe you'll still be doing the wild thing in bed on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your chromosomes are half-chance. So are.
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