When you begin describing the perversions you committed with the youth director, I knock the table over and run to my bedroom and slam the door. I’m wide awake in a nightmare. I keep expecting to hear Rod Serling’s voice behind me: “Consider the case of this man, a minister of god, responsible for holding back the armies of lust and licentiousness, only to find his efforts sabotaged by his own daughter, who…” I cry. I turn off the lights and pray to god for strength. But images keep flashing through my brain, images of you calling the youth director “daddy” as he slipped his hand inside your panties, and of Elder Johnson being so careless in his lust for you, that he got stupid and let his wife catch him with his erection in your mouth. I turn on the lights. I cry some more. I try to pray but it’s useless. I have an erection. Oh, god, isn’t this just the last straw? How much more of this must I take? I can’t sleep, I can’t even lay still. Your red silk panties flash at me. The. "But why" I asked, looking for an answer in all this confusion."Because, it's her new husband, me and him got into a fight, and I told her to choose, me or him ... She choose him, so I have to go live with my dad" He cried into my shoulder."But I don't want you to, I want you to stay here with me, I love you Daniel" I said with my face buried deep in my hands."I love you to Ben, and if there was anyway, anyway in the world I could stay, I would, but I just cant ... I'm sorry".After that night Daniel and I broke up, he said he didn't want to get too close to me and then suddenly have to leave. Daniel was the fist guy I had ever loved, and after him I didn't think I could do it again, I could never love anyone as much as I loved Daniel, he was my first, and my last, for a while anyway.The days began to pass quickly for me, school days turned into weekends, weekends into holidays and holidays into breaks, I hardly went out over this time, I went out a couple of time with Darren and.
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