Christ, if it had two legs and a skirt, you shagged it. That is, unless you were in Scotland, of course.If you had any sense, you popped down to 'The Clinic' every couple of months where, if you'd been unlucky, they gave you a couple of jabs in the arse (painful I can tell you). But generally there wasn't too much to worry about.Anyway one day I was at "The Lido", no more than a disused reservoir really, that had been turned over to a leisure and boating lake, when this vision of beauty caught my eye. She was wearing one of the tiniest of bikinis that I'd ever seen and it left absolutely nothing to the imagination.My first sight of her made me sit up, in all senses of the word. Whilst my fellow lechers were still taking in her beauty, I was on my feet and in for the kill.Unfortunately, this beauty who's name turned out to be Jean, was well aware of me and my reputation before I even knew she existed. She told me to sling my hook in no uncertain terms and using some pretty charming. “Are you ready, darling?” She nervously nodded. I listened closely for the footsteps to get to the just the right spot. When I thought the moment was right I flicked the light switch on, my wife disrobed and stood up to reveal herself to the street. It was a man, on his own, speaking on the phone. My wife walked slowly towards the widow as if she were about to adjust the curtains. With her left arm by her side she reached out with her right arm and grasped the curtain, and that is when he looked. The stranger in the street looked straight into my home and cast his eyes over her naked body. His conversation stopped dead, his head transfixed in my wife’s direction as he kept walking by, but at a slower pace than before. My wife having pretended not to have noticed him until now, feigned embarrassment beautifully. Acting very innocently, she caught eyes with the stranger and was ‘outraged’; she poorly attempted to cover herself but fumbled at every attempt. After she felt that he.
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