Clara will be simpering with the ring on her finger — although I own to you, that I have never seen such a small stone in my life. I do not know what she thinks she has to boast of in such a trumpery little ring. She and Mrs Macready will be full of the details of her coming spring wedding. I cannot bear it! It is my birthday, not Clara Macready’s day. She will have her wedding day soon enough. Mama will giving me those sharp looks, to what purpose? How to catch a man as Clara has done — she is a full year younger than I, yet will be married while I remain imprisoned at home with Mama. No no! Let me not fall into the hysteria now. I am happy, of course. I am so grateful to Mama for her forbearance. I wish … but I would not push myself at men as Clara Macready and Cecily Miles do. I cannot bear it! Oh please no, not the dreadful hysteria. Mama beats me so with the ivory ruler and I cannot help screaming with it. Perhaps if I had beauty such as Clara’s, or a title like the. It was something so utterly wonderful I want us to tell Janie about it as well, but I have to tell you now. I have to talk about me and Ted, is that alright?” “Of course it is, my sweet. Of course it is.” “When I started us off on that safari Ron, I thought it was just going to be a really fun sexy thing to do. You made it so much more for me. Ted and I had such fun with it. I’m sorry, but I didn’t give you the whole picture. My part was to make sure you never got to the end of the safari before losing control and pumping your spunk. Hence all the sexy talk and the teasing.” “Ted never made it to the end of the safari, until the last time we played. We knew he was ill, and we knew the treatment was going to be aggressive.” “Ali, my girl,” he said, “it’s all going to be a bit rough. Before it starts, let’s have a safari again shall we? You never know, I might get there this time.” “Well… we got there, and it was amazing. We were both so proud and happy, but it was the last real sex.
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