I have the money and the location to make it work well." My offer would be simple. I will provide her a room in my apartment, 3 meals a day, and I will pay her tuition, books and some other expenses for one semester at Green Valley State University. She will satisfy me that she is making good effort at her schooling. If she is getting a 3-point average at the end of the first semester, or if she is getting a lower average but can convince me that she is making good effort at her school work, I will extend the offer for one more semester. At the end of 1 year we can discuss whether either of us desires to extend to arrangement further." Is that the kind of arrangement you want to see?" he asked?"Yeah," said Cyndi. "But you know that Bill got more out of it than that! You can't include 'benefits' in any expression of this deal. And, yes, I did discuss this with her. She clearly understands about the unspoken 'fringe benefits' possibilities of this agreement. She understands and agrees. Once we had sex, I was awed by it, but, I was awed because of the sentimental relation that we had shared, a thing she wasted no time in pointing me out again, by that time, believe me, I already knew I wasn't normal, besides, I had started looking at women much, much more, but in a totally different way. I was envious, I envied everything about them, I envied everything about being a woman, the way they could get dressed, the way that they expressed themselves, the way that they could feel sexy without being bothered, their figures.I started night and day, dreaming about being a woman, I no longer looked at women as the other gender, but as the gender I had to be, mind you, I wasn't gay, but I still looked at men and wondered, wondered about being with them while being a woman and as my discomfort with being a man grew, I started remembering things from my childhood, things I had blocked out because everyone laughed at me. I was a very skinny, very small kid and I liked to play girl.
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