"We called 'em our 'harem girls' but they were just simple minded girls that wanted a strong man to take charge. Are you listening to me boy? I'm giving you the wisdom that I wished I had when I was your age!"I couldn't help but lean forwards - this being much more useful information that I could use.He continued before waiting for a response. "They didn't even know it at first, some of 'em, but we could spot them. Your grandma for example - hated her brothers, was fighting with her mother and was not bright enough for anything but making babies. Me and the boys had plenty of fun with her, taking every virginity she had to give." Grandpa laughed again, his gaze far away, possibly imagining his wife all those years ago. Me, I could not imagine grandma as anything but an old woman. Was it possible that grandpa was loosing his mind and that this was all some demented figment of his imagination?"I took a while to marry her - long after she was well trained of course. Damn, I miss fucking. 'I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two.'We haven't used that repairman since...IDIOT SIGHTING.I live in a semi rural area.We recently had a new neighbor call the local city council office to request the removal of the DEAR CROSSING sign on our road.The reason: 'Too many dears are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE.My daughter went to a Mexican fastfood and ordered a taco.She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.IDIOT SIGHTING.I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'IDIOT SIGHTING.The pedestrian light on the corner beeps when it's safe to.
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