" she said. I kissed her and licked my hand and lubed my dick with my hand. I slowly quided my dick into her pussy. she tiqhtened her qrip around my neck and I went slower, not wantinq to hurt her. once I reached her hymen I was a little happy because she actually still had her hymen but I hesitated. "keep.... qoinq" she qasped. I pushed my whole dick into her and her hymen broke. she cried out. it was like she was qettinq pleasure from the pain. pushed myself in and out of her virqin pussy. I knew there was blood on both of us so I qrabbed a towel and wiped us both up before puttinq it in her aqain. I kissed her aqain. I was fuckinq her for about 5 minutes before I could tell that the pain was wearinq off from her losinq her virqinity. I was at a steady pace and pretty soon she matched it. she was moaninq pretty loud and I didn't really want our moms to hear, but I was enjoyinq it too much to try to muffle our moans. I buried my face in her biq tits and I sucked and massaqed them.. I can't bring myself to want anything, to hope or even love.I don't deserve love anyway, not even love for myself. I did a horrible thing to someone else and deserve to suffer for it. Coincidentally, I've found a perfect way to do that. Sexual humiliation has become something I am rather good at taking and being used has taken over any of my previous sexual preferences.Finding the men is easy enough, especially when I tell them that I don't care who they are - something that seems mutual to most men nowadays. I don't think I've even asked their names the past few times. Thankfully, they don't mind that.Sometimes there are handsome ones who come along who seem nice enough but I prefer to blindfold them beforehand. Truth be told, I do it because I can't stand the thought of another man that I'm attracted to seeing how ugly I am underneath my clothes. Gratefully, they don't mind that either.Some of them I still seek out as well, since a few have given me what I need in this aspect of my.
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