He was our 16 year old neighbor. Ben was 6 foot tall and a typical lazy teenager. He was failing nearly all of his classes and didn’t care. He was not one of my wife’s students but all the teachers knew of his reputation. He thought his height, curly blonde hair and boyish good looks would get him everything he needed in life. "I am working on my computer but he can use my wife’s computer," I responded. She thanked me and promptly left while he went right to work. I sat at my own keyboard and typed away. Half an hour later I remembered I had a chore to do. I would have to leave and so would Ben. I was going to open the door and tell him he had to leave. But before I opened the door, I decided to see if he was looking up porn. I peeked in the far entrance to my wife’s office near the computer. I was stunned at what I saw. Ben was masturbating while looking at a picture of some chick with huge tits. That is not what stunned me. What stunned me was the size of his cock. He had to be at. We had valid passports, visas, so it wasn’t an issue. However, what happened next was unexpected, certainly at this bar.The English-speaking cop, produced two small urine specimen cups from his coat pocket, handed them to us.“Please provide urine samples. We check for illegal contraband,” said the young cop, in a coldly formal cadence.Being a tad buzzed, I reached for my fly, was about to whip out my dick and piss right there. But the cops winced, and the English speaker waved me off, forming an X with his arms, and pleaded: “No! No! No! We take you to WC!”In the bathroom, Piggy, Randy and Chad were already there, looking something between pissed off and confused.Drug tests at expat bars are common these days, in Xi Jinping’s China, but they aren’t too frequent in predominantly Chinese bars... Chad was stuttering, trying Fabian tactics, something about a kidney issue, his blue eyes getting watery.But his protesting was otiose. The coppers were stolid, unwavering, and ushered us one at.
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