Of course, there was once a time when that would have sent me scuttling back to my flat, nervous and trembling like a virgin in bed, facing her first sexual encounter. Not anymore. I'm much more secure and confident as Carol these days and those memories seemed like they belonged to another person.I can still remember the time I was tricked into the local hairdressers for my first blonde perm, wearing a mauve pencil skirt, stockings, heels and a black blouse. The hairdresser, a young blonde herself would have dropped her hairdryer if I'd told her I was really a transvestite who needed a more feminine style. When she had finished and I looked in the mirror I could hardly recognise myself with golden blonde hair, cut in a fringe but long and straight at the sides and curling gently under at the ends. I felt like a new woman when I left the salon. I spent the best part of a year living a double life until one day I made the decision.I gave notice at my flat and as Carol, I rented. .I looked up with tears flowing wanting to know what she means. Momsmiled and said she has the information and will see how I do changingover.What does all that mean? How could they "switch me over" to being asissy?Mom and I got home and my sister Kim wanted to know why I was not injail. After my Mom explained Kim was all smiles. First time in years mysister hugged me and would not let go. What is up with this? We all satdown and Mom told me what I would do as my sister looked so pleased."Paul, the judge saved your life. She has sentenced you to a calmer lifeand one I hope you will be comfortable in. You surely will not begetting in trouble with your new lifestyle. It is important you followmy every word, accept your new position in life and learn to be a goodsissy. There is nothing wrong with being a sissy and enjoying that life.Many boys your age have learning to love their new life and are muchhappier for it."I couldn't take anymore thinking I would jump out the window and.
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