She loved Terry in her own way. He was a good man, kind and gentle. There was no doubt he loved her and was devoted to her, but Vivian had come to realize shortly after they were married (if not before) that there was something missing from their relationship, a deep seated need within her which was going unfulfilled. She had thought she could overcome it by sheer will power, immersing herself in their marriage and being Terry's wife. But ultimately the protective barrier she had established to keep out those deep desires had been breached and now her life had been turned upside down.She now knew her love for Terry, however that might be defined, was simply now strong enough to suppress her need for domination and the strange desire for someone like Cherise who could provide the best of both sexes. She reviled herself, knowing what others would think of her, yet was helpless to resist. She knew what Cherise had in mind when she told her she would be coming to a party. Submissives are. ’ We drove home in silence. When we got there Carol started to talk. I said, ‘Shut up.’ I said, ‘You cheated on me. I don’t know if I can stay married to a cheat.’ Carol said, ‘Dick please, please forgive me. I didn’t know you’d take it that way.’ I said, ‘How could you not know when I was so specific about Mark. Were you overcome with lust? There is no fucking excuse. We always did these things together. Have you cheated with others?’ Carol came over to me, tears falling down her face, to put her arms around me. I rebuffed her. I pushed her away. At that moment I wanted nothing to do with her. My world was crumbling. I told Carol that I was going to a hotel tonight. She could call me on my cell if there were any emergency. I went into the bedroom and bathroom and packed some clothes and toiletries. I checked into the Peabody hotel. I brought a bottle of whiskey to my room and drank until I passed out. I woke up several times and each time there were tears on my face. Deep in the.
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