After Tiff and I spent what seemed like hours picking out the perfect tree, Dad strapped our prize to the top of the station wagon and we drove home slower than normal. He helped Mom put it in its stand, then took care of the lights outside while his three ladies spent two or three hours decorating it with lights and balls and tinsel. After we were done, Dad lifted me up to put the angel at the very top while Mom made hot chocolate. As the three of us sat on the couch, Dad brought out a huge package and put it under the tree. Tiff and I had to check it out of course, and I found out it was for me from my Granny. She'd tole me she had something special for me the last time we'd talked on the phone, and I could feel the "special" just by looking at it. It was covered in bright, shiny paper decorated with elves and Santas, tied up with a shiny red ribbon that must have been two inches wide and had been fashioned into a huge bow. Trying to lift it (that sucker was heavy), poking it,. . I guess,” said Jack.“He’s going to be raised as a giant,” said Dinah. “I don’t think it would work too well if, when he was ten, he was taller than his father.”“Oh,” said Jack.“I just want to have sex with you,” said Dinah. “There aren’t enough giants to go around up there,” she said. “And you’re the only man I know who can make me happy that way.” She stopped smiling. “I’m horny, Jack.”Jack frowned. Having sex with Dinah had pretty much started this whole crazy train wreck, except that trains hadn’t been invented yet, and it wasn’t really a wreck, but you get my meaning.“Let’s go talk to Harmony,” he said.“Why?” asked Dinah. “I picked some beans on the way down.”“Because I love her,” he insisted. “I think I’m going to ask her to marry me, if I can get up the courage to do that, and I don’t think she’d mind, except that when I was having sex with Coreen she said something that suggested she didn’t expect me to have lots of sex with other women.”“You had sex with your sister?” gasped.
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