Still, I had a female body now and was more than a little curious to findout what a woman's orgasm felt like and this offer right here wouldcertainly fit the bill.All the same the thought of being up close to a man's body was just kindof revolting. I realized I shouldn't have flirted with him so long but nowthat he'd bought me a couple of drinks I didn't know what else to do."Maybe we should just exchange phone numbers for now," I suggested tryingto back down from the offer.He seemed let down but by the way he hurriedly scribbled down his phonenumber for me on a napkin showed his continued deep interest in me. Iwrote mine on the back of another napkin for him and we exchanged napkins.I made some excuse or another after that and vanished quick as I couldinto the drunken throng on the dance floor.By the time the evening was over and I'd taken a cab back to my hotel I'drounded up four more phone numbers from different guys I met at the club.I couldn't believe it. Five guys had hit on me. The shock of the pain made me jerk my wrist once too often. The wire made its first cut. I groaned in misery. I lost all hope, all pride. To be so robbed by Alfred. How bitter..... I wept uncaring. "A really lovely mark. Pity you can´t see it." Alfred´s voice seemed far away. I flinched as his finger traced the wound he had made. "You can stop making a fuss. I ain´t going to hit you no more."What had I become that this clod could make me know such thankfulness. Not to be whipped again! Perhaps without the whip I could survive. I said "thank you", gratefully. How I loathed myself."No use hurting a girl too bad," Alfred said thoughfully."There´s always another day." He shambled away to his kitchen. I was nauseated with the pain. I longed to die. We close our eyes when there are things we cannot bear. I closed mine. I had no coherent thought. I wondered if Mike Sandos knew of the awfulness of this thing. I longed to plead to him. Yet I was glad he had not seen my abasement before.
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