After the divorce I was supposed to have access to my children, but I haven't seen them for five months. Either they are not well, or they are on a special day out. Then they go on holiday during my access time."Maria stood up, went to Paul, kissed his cheek, and hugged him to her breast."Oh, you poor man, you poor, poor man. How could they do that to you? No wonder you want to get away. What about her lover? What happened to him?"She started to wobble on her high heels, and Paul felt the need to help her back to her seat. Once she was seated again he continued."Well of course he was married, but there's no point in going after him. He died in a road accident about three weeks after he sent me that message." Does his wife know?" No, I don't think so. I don't see any point in making her suffering any worse. The poor woman has lost her husband. What good would it do for her to know that he was really a worthless shit?" Well if it were my Will, I think I would want to know. It will help. ..I have a faraway smile on my face, as do you, and we are locked in eye contact... the atmosphere is intense, my mind and body are in overload... I moan and nod, slowly at first, almost subconsciously, gently pushing my belly up higher, offering it to you...'Take me... take my belly... stab me and kill me !' I say, like so many times before. 'Pleaaaaase.... give it to me... I need it, I must have it....' We have talked this way so many times, you know all the unbelievable, submissive things I like to say... 'I must be killed ! I must ! Kill me and slay your animal ! Kill your cow ! You know you must... you have promised ! Stab me... STAB ME !!!!! OH GOD...... I NEED IT SO MUCH ! I NEED TO BE KILLED, YOU KNOW I DO, YOU UNDERSTAND...... CUT ME OPEN !!!! SLICE ME !!!! I MUST HAVE IT, IT HAS TO BE THIS WAY !!!!!'You put one hand on my forehead, and begin to apply pressure to my belly with the other, pushing the knife down... My eyes are as wide as my smile as I feel the knife penetrate.
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