" "Can I see it?" she asked. I took it from my bedside drawer. She examined it carefully, turning it on and feeling the buzz from it. Twisting the base to turn it up, then down again. "Cool!" was her verdict, "Can I borrow it?" "Okay, but you have to be careful, it might hurt at first," I warned her, "and for God's sake, don't let mum know. And clean it after you use it. This is only 'til the weekend, I will get you one of your own on Saturday if you want." "Honest? Oh Marie, thank you," and she wrapped that beautiful girl/woman body around me. After a few moments I felt her hands start to move slowly, one hand sliding down to hold my bottom, the other cupping one of my boobs. I pretended not to notice, even when her finger started stroking a nipple, but when she snuggled in to me and I felt her teeth on my neck, I knew I had to say something. I had to say something. The trouble was, it felt so good, and I could feel myself getting aroused. At that moment, I heard the front door slam,. I noticed my stomach was swollen and thought it was probably because Im due for my period and dismissed it, but it didnt stop me from rubbing it subconsciously. I shook my head and got in the tub slowly with a glass of red wine to contemplate my options, particularly what decision I would make about my life, as I lay in the lavender and jasmine bath water I wrote a note. That note read as follows:- My gift to you doesnt come gift wrapped, with a pretty bow on it or in a beautiful box or even a lovely card. My gift to you is to free myself from the burden that is my life. This life I live is not a life, it is a prison, an asylum, a life sentence if you will but it is anything but a life anyone would want to live. I wander nameless and aimless. People see me but never know my name or care to ask if I am okay. I go through the same routine like clockwork. Nothing ever changes, people use me and I do nothing to stop it. I am lonely. I put on a mask everyday from when I wake up until I go.
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