Disconsolate and alone, I pulled the blankets back up from where I had tossed them in my futile efforts to find Abigail and lay there wracked by the awful pain of loss, saying Abigail's name over and over.I just didn't know how long I could go on with this hollowness and pain.Reverend Smith said at times like this I should pray for guidance and try to focus on some happy times with Abigail. Sometimes it worked for a little while as I got lost in the sweet memories of our love, but then it would all collapse knowing we would never have happy times again.I got out of bed and sat in the big leather chair by the window and watched the rain swept darkness, feeling the ice that gripped my soul. The clock said it was three a.m. I hadn't been asleep more than a few hours. We got back from Christmas Eve services and by the time I got Amelia settled in with Taylor, it was pretty late.Finally, I gave up and went downstairs. I walked through the quiet house with only the chimes of the hall clock. After a three hour drive, we got to the spot where we always park our car. We got out, gathered our equipment and had a quick bite to eat, before we started the five hour hike to where we do our camping. It’s a long hike but the view of the peaceful lake and beautiful surrounding mountain wilderness is its own reward. My mom may be 38 but she’s in good shape and can carry her own share of the gear. We’d packed pretty light… just a small tent, sleeping rolls, cooking supplies, the clothes we were wearing and fishing gear. Everything was tucked neatly into our backpacks. My rifle was slung over my shoulder, just in case we ran into an aggressive a****l.We’d been hiking for about 4 hours when the sky quickly became overcast with dark, heavy clouds. It was close to 4 in the afternoon and it looked like we were going to get rained on so we moved up the hill until we found a small nearly level spot to set up a camp. We still had another hour to hike before we got to our favorite fishing.
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