." she interrupted."Yeah, seriously right?" I'd spent years trying to figure out why myfamily gave up on me. I wondered if they had been more like theCarson's where I would be today."I would never do something like that to my kid..." She thought aboutthat a second. "Not like I'm going to have kids in the traditionalsense..." You never know, maybe you adopt? Maybe you meet someone with kidsalready..." Amber just nodded, so I pressed on, "I was pretty lowafter getting out of the hospital from the beating I took. Certainlythought about suicide more times than is healthy. I finally moved inwith a friend and the internet became an outlet, a place to get myselfsome positive feedback finally, since no one was giving that to me.Talking to guys online was easy - I was anonymous, so were they.Sending pictures was exciting, especially when you're being told howsexy you look, how hot you are making the person on the other end.Then I stared webcam sessions. Only thing is I didn't connect. Once again, my stubbornness gets the best of me. Lucky for me, a passerby, who heard my screams for help, jumped in after me and brought me safely to shore. As we sat on the sand, I thanked him repeatedly. It could have all ended right then and there, but as fate would have it, a policeman was making his rounds on the beach in his patrol car looking for “unusual activity”. He stopped the car and exited, asking us what was going on. Foolishly, I explained the entire story to him.“What does ‘no trespassing’ mean?” The officer asked me in a pissed off tone.“Sir, she’s fine. She just panicked in the water,” the man who saved me explained.“I wasn’t speaking to you,” the officer replied to him.“I just wanted to take a swim and see how far I could go, the waves were stronger than I thought and I had a difficult time getting back,” I said as I reiterated my story.“Miss, that wasn’t my question,. I asked you what does ‘no trespassing mean’,” he asked again.“It means I shouldn’t have gone in.
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