Chachu nay mujh ko bistar par ghorra bannay ko bola aur mein bhi fauran apni gaand phela kar ghorra ban gia. Is dafa topa aasani say andar chala gia, kuchh seconds ruknay kay baad Chachu nay ahista ahista lund gaand kay andar ghusaanay laga. Usnay meray kamar ko pakrra hua tha aur mein nay bhi apni taangain puri phelai hui thi, ab thorra thorra dar bhi honay laga tha lekin maein nay bardasht aur koi awaz naheen nikali. Phir Chachu nay ek haath kamar say haatya aur meray lund ko suhlaanay laga jo ki sukarr kar ek inch ka ho gia tha. Adha lund ghusaanay kay baad Chachu ruk gia aur mein bhi ek gehri saans li, hum don say koi bhi naheen hila aur phir chand mintues kay baad dard khatm ho gia aur gaand lund ko apnay andar khinchnay laga. Chachu bola “ mera lorra teri gaand ko pasand aagia” aur is dafa us nay dono haathon say meray chootrron ko phelaya aur lund ko andar dabanay laga. Lund koi ek inch aur gia aur phir bohut zor say dard shru hogia aur meri cheekh nikal gai aur mein siskian. It forced me back into that role, it kept me fully cognizant that no matter how far I had traveled as an individual, like a yo-yo on a psychological string, I could be yanked right back at a moment's notice. I would once again have to move like her, dress like her, make my hair like her, fuck like her, and eat like her. Primarily, this ritual reminded me that no matter how many things I did that were unlike my mother; the charities I took on, the children I read to, the aggressive sexual posture with Patricia; or how much surgery I had to look different than her. I was in fact just an advanced version of her shell. Because, as much as I didn't accept it, I made myself try to forget it. Every single thing I did was counter to the person I would have been if left to my own devices. I was created after all, so were all of my behaviors. I may not be strictly Melinda, but I was not anything near the teenage boy I left behind six years ago.I went into the bathroom, took a shower and drank.
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