At that she stirred, pulling herself away from my lap and sitting upright. ‘Oh, did I fall asleep?’ she asked, looking at me with those sweet eyes. ‘Sorry if I kept you up.’ I smiled. ‘You didn’t.’ She kept her hand on my leg as she turned her attention towards the movie. ‘So what’s going on in the movie?’ I filled her in. ‘They broke up, even though they still love each other. He knows that he can’t fully give her his whole heart, so he’s letting her go because he wants her to be happy.’ As soon as those words escaped my lips, I realized that I wasn’t really talking about the movie. She looked at me knowingly. ‘But it doesn’t have to be like that’, she said. ‘He can give her his whole heart, he just doesn’t want to, out of some…misguided guilt or something.’ We looked at each other, and for a brief moment, I held my hand in hers. She smiled at me just for a second, but the smile faded when I rose up from the couch. ‘Well, I’m off to bed’, I said as I got up, but Karla held. Except...she was lost. She had no ideawhere to go. It had been months since she'd been anywhere else other thanher apartment and the office. The very idea of going anywhere else filledher mind with emptiness. That had been happening more and more lately.She'd be picking up the phone and forgetting what it was she had to say.She'd be typing and forget what it was she was writing. She was giggling,actually GIGGLING, whenever she saw a new recruit being frogmarched intothe office. She was becoming the perfect little airheaded girl. And itmade her sick. She was sure it was because of that damned shots they'dmade her have on her arrival. That crazy-looking doctor with the purplehair...she'd been so scared of him. But lately she found herself makingexcuses to go down to visit him. She'd twirl her hair between her fingersand bat her eyelashes at him, until he'd unzip his pants and give her herreward.......ewww...the mere thought of it made Bambi gag.She had to escape. Get back out into the.
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