I was surprised by seeing two people I was missing for so many days. When I smiled at them both looked very coy and bent their heads refusing to meet my eyes. Then Subbu Aunty looked up and said we are having an addition in our family. I saw Mother turn away and color pink with shyness. I went to Aunt and hugged her and she held me and whispered that she is pregnant. 10 weeks now. I slowly put my hands on her belly and tried to see if the bulge could be felt. She pushed me away and laughed saying it is very early for the bulge but I went to the doctor and he told me. I looked at her with love and she said it is yours no doubt you are one who is soaking me with your semen. I felt like crying with joy. Here was my aunt who without seeking anything for herself submitted to me whenever I went to her for love. I asked her what about your daughter my cousin. Aunt told me that she is yet to know but eventually she plans to tell her also about us.All this time I had ignored mother and when I. Das weiß ich von einem Freund, der nach eigener Aussage keineswegs resistent gegen meine Art ist, dem es jedoch so viel Freude bereitet, andere Männer an mir zugrunde gehen zu sehen, dass er selbst alles dafür tut, nicht selbst eines meiner Opfer zu werden. Denn sonst wäre, sagt er, seine ganze Freude dahin. Ich sehe es ihm nach, dass er diese ganze Freude aus dem Sadismus zieht, weil ich ihm da gar nicht so unähnlich bin: Gewiss, ich versuche mit meiner Art auch manchmal an das zu kommen, was ich haben will – beispielsweise an einen guten Job –, aber die größere Erquickung gewinne ich daraus, einen Mann zugrunde zurichten.Junias, der erwähnte Freund, und ich, wir brauchen uns, wenn es wieder mal so weit ist, nur kurz anzusehen und können ohne große Worte in den Augen des jeweils Anderen die tiefe Befriedigung darüber sehen, dass wieder ein Mann an mir zerbrochen ist. Die Tatsache, dass wir da völlig auf einer Wellenlänge liegen und uns gemeinsam darüber freuen können, gibt uns den.
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