”The man is aghast. He swerves violently off the road, and pulls the car to a screeching halt.“You fucking cheat!” he screams. “You’ve been playing off the ladies’ tees all week.”Q: How do you know when you’re really ugly?A: Dogs close their eyes when they’re humping your legMemories from Chuck B When I was in an all-boys high school, back during World War II, there was a fellow student with the surname of Cherkov. You can imagine how a bunch of teen boys pronounced that name. He was something of what may now be called a geek, and would always try to be first to answer questions in class. There was one time though, in I think a history class, the instructor asked a question, and the young man madly waved his hand as usual. Perhaps the older male instructor was a bit peeved at the antics, and I will always recall the rather disgusted tone of his voice as he said, “Okay Cherkov, shoot.” Someone started snickering, and in a moment the entire class was rolling in laughter to the. I was lost to all sane society. In high school productions of plays and musicals I basked in the plaudits of my admiring fans – well, mostly mum, dad and my grandparents. I knew I was destined to make it to the top on the stage, in films, or in any branch of the entertainment industry you cared to name. After high school and a job in the local supermarket replenishing stock on the shelves, I became the pride of the local Amateur Dramatic Society. Any role that I wanted I got, but looking back to that time I now know it was because they could never get any young men to audition, except me. Aged twenty I left behind the ‘little town blues’ and the admonitions of my parents, and headed for the big city to meet my histrionic predestination. I had saved a huge sum of money from my labours in the supermarket, that in fact lasted about two weeks once I arrived in the metropolis. It covered the rent security I had to put down for one miserable room, and allowed me to eat for a fortnight. I.
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