Blasted things! Anyway, how are you?” “I’m fine thanks. Lovely weather here. Paul’s just left for a pop concert.” “Good. It’s kind of you to have him stay while we’re away. I know he’s not a teenager any more, but we couldn’t trust him with the house.” “It’s my pleasure darling. Are you having a good break? Been in the sea yet?” “No, not yet. We had some trouble with the Morris on the way down but Derek soon sorted that. The sea air’s given him a new lease of life though! We’ve been in bed most of the time! The cottage is lovely and the bay is secluded.” “Good! I’m so glad, after all you’ve been through.” “Yes, thanks again Mum.” “Ooh, one thing. Actually I did have a little bit of trouble with Paul.” “You did?” “Yes. I caught him masturbating. Naked as a jaybird he was. All he could say was “Oh, Nan!” I wasn’t happy.” “Was this in his bedroom?” “Oh no! That would have been forgivable.” “Where then?” “In the orangery. It’s lucky we’re not overlooked!” “What a strange place to be. " It's nice to hear my daughter's name on your lips instead of the feudish little nicknames you kids use on each other," Tanya quipped."Hey! I love my kid sister!" Frank Junior expounded, cheerfully rejecting his mother's unwelcome comment. "I've saved her life at least a dozen times this year, alone!" Saved her life?" Jake asked, surprised. "I thought she was a teacher." That was years ago!" Tanya interjected. "Now she jumps off buildings for a living!" She was clearly displeased with her youngest daughter's career choice."She's a stunt girl," Frank Junior told him, trying to rescue his sister's reputation. "She hires herself out..." To be killed!" Tanya interjected unhappily, verifying her already known opinion.Her son sighed and began again. "She does stunt work that other stunt people won't do." You mean snuff work?" Jake asked, his eyebrows raised.Frank Junior nodded. It was called snuff work because, more often than not, certain stunts were practically guaranteed to send a stunt.
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