I woke unsure of where I was. I felt the warmth of another person in bed with me and for a moment I thought it was Beth. I wanted to tell her about the crazy dream that I was having, but then the last day came rushing back into memory and my spirits fell. My hip was aching where it had caught the bullet. I tried to lie quietly and not disturb Ruth, who was sharing my bed, but I felt restless, confined.I eased myself out of the bed and watched Ruth’s breathing to make sure that she was still asleep. When she didn’t stir, I tip-toed out into the main room and sat on the sofa, staring at the blank wall. I tried praying, but the “skies were as brass.” I tried to fall back on recalling scripture from memory, but I couldn’t stay focused. I sub-vocalized. came the reply.The wall lit up with a view of Earth from space. The entire globe hung before me, silent, turning imperceptibly. We were still in Earth orbit, just a few hundred miles up, but I would never go back. For some reason, I needed. You told me that you had been interested in me the year before but did not feel comfortable being seen with a fourteen year old, you did not feel comfortable being with a fifteen year old, but your interest in me was great. I felt guilty because I had thought of you as just another girl.You were a senior and you told me that you would be leaving when you graduated and that we could be friends, like I was with your brother.I agreed because I did like you and for the next several weeks we would meet with the other smart kids and talk about relevant issues and discuss life in general. I was accepted by that group as you were. I would go to your house on the pretext of seeing Eugene, knowing he was not there, and being the good sister you would sit outside with me and talk.That was where I fell in love with you, sitting out there until the sun set, thinking about you as you gave me a lift home, sneaking glances and knowing that the town you lived in was not that far, not knowing you were.
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