I took the shell off my racing snail, thinking it would make him run faster.If anything, it made him more sluggish.And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life"But John came fifth, and won a toaster.Q: How do you think the unthinkable?A: With an itheberg.Someone stole my mood ring.I don't know how I feel about that.I tried to catch fog yesterday--Mist.The first rule of Alzheimer's club--Is don't talk about chess club.Why does a chicken coop have two doors?If it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.She looked surprised.This one is compliments of DennisThis happened to a friend of mine. Beware, it could happen to you. Ladies, please pass this on to your husbands, fathers, uncles, etc. so they will not fall prey to this scam.Women often receive warnings about protecting themselves at the mall and in dark parking lots, etc. This is the first warning I have seen for men. I wanted to pass it on in case. But I was willing to play along.I flipped my shoes off, one by one, then my socks. I unbuttoned my black shirt, studying her face. I noticed two wine glasses near the bed. One half empty. I recalled how she gets when she is drinking. I looked down to start to unbuckle my belt and looked up just in time to watch her quickly divert her eyes and at the same time trying to quickly talk about aura readings..Jeans unbuttoned and unzipped I slipped them off. Just in my boxer shorts she said, ‘That’s good. Now lay down’.I gave her a little smile and walked over to the bed where she sat. I lay down.________________________“Now, this is your root chakra,” I explained, placing my hand about 3 inches above his groin area. “And what happens there?” he replied, with a grin and a raised eyebrow.“Wouldn’t you like to know?” I teased back. “Yeah, I would, actually”“Well, it’s the foundation chakra … it speaks to the ability to be grounded. To be in the here and now”. “And am I in the, what did you.
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