She grabbed my hand and asked, “So, I suppose that those are for any commitments to become the Gold Standard Ensemble. Who are the others intended for?”“Additional singers,” I said.“Anyone I know?” she stopped and asked.“Maybe Joan, Peter and Isabel ... at least to start. Parents have to be asked and such, but maybe we could get them all to join us, at least until Peter goes off to college.”“Interesting, how you always find a way to include Isabel,” she said.Quite fortunately, my phone rang, “Hello, this is Michael Thomas, how may I help you today?”“Smartass,” Katie’s voice came over the phone. “Where are you?”“Evansville at the Mall.”“OK, Alice and I are coming there. There isn’t much to choose from up here in Vincennes. Bye.”“They’re coming to us. We can have lunch together, how’s that sound, sweetheart?” I asked Jenn.She walked up against me and said, “I love you honey bear.”“What?”“I was trying it out ... don’t you like it?”“Not sure. There’s the place I got my tuxedo from,. You deserved better than me. The girls deserved a better Mom than me." I wish I could change, sweetheart. I want to be the woman you always wanted as your wife. I have gone down this road too long to change now. There simply isn't time to change the way I wish I could for you, even if I could." Please don't grieve for me too long, Patrick. There are too many people around you that love you. Don't hurt them the way I have hurt you. Be there for the girls. You have been Mom and Dad to them for so long. I know you can keep doing it." Patrick, dear, I am making these disks because I know I will die soon. I cannot explain it, but I know I will. I have often been able, since I was a little girl, to know ahead of time when big changes are coming in my life. I know this is coming. I thought about telling you, and trying to stop it, but I can't. I can't because, somehow, I know that my dying will save your life. I don't know how, but I know it will. I'm glad to do that for you, my dear. I've.
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