It sounds like for them, dressingup is just for fun, or for sex. Me, I dont care about sex, and it doesntfeel like just fun. But at least now I know there is some support outthere.****I had the best weekend ever, diary! My mom and my step-dad went away, soI was alone. Also, my neighbor left me the keys to her place so I couldfeed her cat for her while she's on vacation, so I had the run of both myhouse and hers. So I spent the weekend in a dress, and felt so muchbetter for it. ****I've found some people to hang out with, and I have mixed feelings aboutit. On the one hand, it feels good to not be totally alone all the time,but on the other, I feel sure that they would reject me if they knewabout the girl stuff. Ah, well.****I wish I could have a girlfriend, Diary, but what girl would want a guywho feels more like a girl than a guy? Love is a luxury only "normal"people can afford.****I need a girl name. All the mags talk about having a girl name, even Alexuses "Brenda" when he's. Yes, I had. After you left, I confessed everything to Susan. She was my lifeline, she let me talk and talk. She took care of the boys. She did everything. On the Wednesday, she even came in to see me at the Hospital. We had lunch together. And Peter came and sat with us. I couldn't make a scene and send him away. But really he talked to Susan, about how he understood my problem, about how he wanted to help. Susan lapped it up, she was very impressed by him, which isn't surprising because he can be very charming. Afterwards she said I was probably being very cruel to him, and that I should let him meet me and say his piece, so I met him on Friday for lunch in my office. Just sandwiches. So, by Sunday, I'd met him twice." And what did he say?" That he thought he loved me. That he was going to woo me. And a lot of things about how I couldn't really love you, otherwise I wouldn't have done what I did. That he and I had something special, something magical. That if he was you, he wouldn't.
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