.. Jenny." I said, "I know this is hard on you. I remember my own divorce a few years back. The reasons were much more mundane - we just got tired of each other - but it was still hard on both of us. I remember being thankful that we didn't have kids. Look, Jenny, I can't interfere in your parents' affairs, but anytime you need to talk, please, call or come by. This was bound to come out eventually, even if Luella hadn't decided to spill the beans in person. Now your parents will have to decide what to do with the rest of their lives, and both are probably going to be a little hard to live with, okay?" I'll say!" she sobbed, "Dad's moved out, without even saying goodbye, and Mom's hitting the sauce again! Uncle Gary, what am I going to do?" Hard as it is, Jenny," I said, "it's not up to you to do anything. They have to make these decisions on their own. You can try talking to them, but remember, it's their responsibility to deal with it, not yours. If your efforts don't keep them. “I brought shame to my family. There’s nothing I can do to make up for that. But I believe my death will end much of their suffering, end much of their shame. For that, I’ll be happy to die tomorrow. I’m sorry to them, I’m sorry to my family that I couldn’t do better in school, land a better job, be in a better situation. That I’m a disappointment ... I am truly sorry to my parents. But I’m not sorry to anyone else.”These words were the same as the final statement she’d made. I guess she’d prepared them in blood first.(It struck me that death row inmates in their final hours were probably the only people in China with true freedom of speech, unafraid of the consequences their words would bring. I had trouble imagining anyone else in China speaking or writing publicly with such candor... )It took most of the evening to read, translate the diaries. Once I finished them, I set the letters down. Then I went out to the street to buy some cold noodles for a fast dinner.Sitting on a plastic.
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