Even then, it was only for ten minutes to grab a styro container, load what he wanted, and bring it back with him to her room. Joe noticed when talking to Ashley alone that she had changed. Her laughter and fun nature were still present, but he could tell that it was slightly reserved. Ashley’s swings into self-doubt and depression were mostly gone, too. It was as if she were more in control of her emotions. Her mom commented that it was probably a result of the hormonal change, but Joe would later often reflect back to the day Sister Kate patiently withstood Ashley’s final tantrum as the day she was permanently changed. Ashley never openly apologized to Joe for sending him out of her room, and he understood why. She really needed him out of the room, and he was standing in the way of her independence. Ashley entered the hospital as a confused, hurt girl. She left as an independent woman, with a determination to leave her mark on the world. The doubts he had about staying with her. I can't ask to come. I can't tell her I'm close. But I can moan and whine to let her know I'm about to cum. If I fuck up and come before she tells me then there are painful consequences. I do feel there are many times when she knows I'm close and she makes me come before I'm told just so she can punish me afterwards.MS: I love this part. Never am I more in control then when I have my subs about ready to come. I get these deep primal feelings when I have such complete control over another. I love to hear my subs whine and cry out. I shudder when I think of the power I have as I gaze into their pleading and begging eyes. Of course to have the power you have had to earn their respect and they must know that you will follow through with some severe consequences if they falter and come without permission. K: I am crying out now trying to let her know that I am about to come. I am doing my best to concentrate on not coming. A few years back at our second annual meeting I made the mistake.
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