I just have to find out! Finding out that she lied to me would not be the worst feeling. The worst feeling is the feeling I have right now. Not knowing the truth for certain. There is no worse feeling. If, that last time I talked to ‘Jenova’, she would have said something like, ‘I lied to you about everything, I have no feelings for you, don’t call me, don’t come see me,’ and hung up, I would have been CRUSHED, but I would have, over time, been able to accept it and slowly recover from it. But right now, I have no definite solutions. I simply don’t know. If she told me the truth and said I really don’t love you and don’t want to talk to you anymore, I would have been hurt, but I would have closure for the situation. One day, I was in a flower shop ordering some flowers to be sent to Jenova from a local florist, and in the corner of the shop I saw this little panda looking at me innocently. I melted! I HAD to buy it! So I did. My plan was to send it to Jenova, but I fell in love. .Only the names may have and may not have been changed.Day 2 on the Cruise.I slipped on my new white swim trunks, after getting out of the shower. I checked my watch. It was close to 11am when I got out on deck. I grabbed a quick sandwich, some fruit and a water. I walked around looking for the best pool to hang out at, for the day. The ship did not set sail until 6pm, later that night. It was a good idea to check a few of the pools. From past experience. I did not want to hang out at the lame pool or worst the senior citizen pool. Just a pool where some hot girls were laying around. A nice wet bar in the pool and nothing to loud.I finished up my breakfast as I found a good quite pool. There was a wet bar. A few girls walking around. There was a waitress who spotted me across the pool deck. I motion her for a drink. She quickly brought me a frozen margarita. It was after noon. It's never to early to start drinking on vacation. I threw my beach towel on a big white cozy lounge chair. I.
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